The Magdalene Order of Consciousness

If you’ve been tuned in to this blog at all, you’ll know that the last 6 posts have been about Mary Magdalene. Now, the next rose petal has been elegantly delivered to me and invited to rise fully into my conscious awareness. Magdalene is so much more that a biblical character. On some level I knew that, but my connection with the Marys, Yeshua, and Anna (his grandmother) as individuals had to be well-established first before I was ready to integrate the bigger picture. When I got it, it was a bit of a facepalm moment. And yet, I’ve been working with this much bigger energy for years without having this particular name for it. For me, it’s been “the divine feminine” and “the sacred feminine.”

The delivery came via Catherine Ann Clemett’s book, published in 2018, called Are You a Magdalene?: Discovering Your Divine Feminine Heritage and Purpose. This tiny tome takes only 40 minutes to read, but within the first paragraph, I was buzzing with energy and feeling and speaking a resounding YES! I Am! As I read the rest of the book, the puzzle pieces fell into place: here is an excerpt:

“The Magdalenes, as group consciousness, have existed since the beginning of the planet and even existed before the creation of the planet. They have been present in every age and every culture on the planet under many different names and labels. The feminine aspect of the Magdalenes in Egyptian times were known as The Daughters of Isis. The Magdalenes have shown me they are part of an interdimensional race whose purpose is to ‘seed the light’. They bring the light into the deepest darkest places so that the light will not go out, often where no one else will go.”

This widened my perception even further, and I feel plugged in to an even larger energy than I previously realized I had access to. This is a LINEAGE. My lineage. OUR Lineage. Like an arrow shot from a bow, I already know exactly why I’m here, in this time, in this life, and I’m fully aligned and on purpose with a global vision and the full support of the unseen realms.

I know in my cells that we are being called to RISE. To rise into our full potential and meet our divinity. It’s never been as clear and simple as it is right now. No more intermediaries, no more separation… we ARE the Divine.

Whether you have followed a path of initiation or ordination or not, you are already a Priestess, and you bring forward the wisdom of many lifetimes into the sacred now. So what do you do with that information?

The feminine sexual mysteries that have been quietly kept for millennia are rising to be whispered in your ear and consciously expanded into our modern world.

The secrets are being revealed and the path illuminated… the time of rebirth and resurrection is at hand. I, an ordained High Priestess since 2003, am heeding the call to be the overflowing chalice for this potent magic, along with my Sister Priestess Emma Beth in the mystical land of Avalon… one of the places very sacred to the Magdalenes. 
 
If you are called to Avalon, you are being called HOME to receive and integrate these sacred mysteries that are vital for the healing and wholeness of our Mother Gaia and Her people.
 
Walk in the footsteps of Mary Magdalene, Yeshua, and their enlightened ancestors as you re-weave the sacred balance of masculine and feminine within your body and heart. Receive alchemical initiations and transmissions that will bring you into the wholeness you’ve been preparing for your entire life. Rise fully into the powerful priestess you’ve always known yourself to be. It is both your right and your responsibility.
 
There is a $300 off early bird discount for The Sacred Feminine Sexual Mysteries of Avalon, June 15-19 in Glastonbury, the Chalice Well, and the White Spring. It’s available through Imbolc, February 1st. The deposit secures your discount and zero-interest payment plans are available. If you know you are called, don’t miss this opportunity.
The first 13 women to register also receive incredible bonuses. If you are called, now is the time to register. Once you make the commitment, the way is shown… the resources show up… the doors fly open!
With deep love and devotion, Amrita
Posted in Mary Magdalene | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Part 6: Mary Magdalene and The Chalice Well in Avalon

This is the final post in the series, and the hardest one to write. My experience of The Chalice Well in Avalon was deeply personal and very close to my heart. I will try to find the words. If you have missed the first 5 articles in this series, you can start at the beginning here. I promise it will take you on an exciting vicarious journey!

A Priestess in our midst

The Chalice Well in AvalonEmma Beth came through my first Certified Spiritual Sexual Educator® Training in 2018-2019 and brought with her a deep rootedness in the ways of the Gaia priestess. I recognized her immediately as one of my own… a sister on a very deep level. She told me later that as soon as she looked in my eyes (via a zoom call), she knew she would sign on for the training program.

Who said that?

Em was one of the first 2 women to complete the Certification and become a Licensed Teacher. After her graduation, we started a regular schedule of monthly zoom calls. At the end of one of those calls, just a few months ago, the word “Glastonbury” just popped out of my mouth. It actually felt like it was spoken by someone else. Like a cartoon character, I wanted to turn around to see who said it, but of course I was the only one in the room.

She smiled and said, “No wonder Glastonbury has come up several times in the last few days! I live an hour away and visit there quite often!” The synchronicity felt amazing. I had never been there and I knew almost nothing about it. And yet, I’ve carried a bottle from the Chalice Well in Avalon with its precious water through 5 or 6 moves. Gifted to me many years ago, I held on to it but still knew very little about the place it came from… except that it is the mythical land of Avalon, to which I feel deeply connected. I knew it was time.

Excuses are helpful, but not required

A Plan quickly sprung up to visit the UK, with the excuse of visiting the retreat center in The Netherlands that I’ll be teaching at in 2020. Em and I agreed to spend a few days together in Glastonbury and look at venues for a possible collaboration. I realized that this is part of why I wanted to train teachers… so that I would have high-caliber collaborators.

As soon as I knew I would be visiting, I became a “Companion” (member) of The Chalice Well Gardens and learned more about this ancient, sacred well. Apollo and I arrived in London on July 29, 2019, and Em picked us up and drove us to Glastonbury. We passed by Stonehenge on the drive quite unexpectedly, and Apollo shot a pic out the car window.

The red thread begins in Avalon

Em described Glastonbury as “A place where you might see someone in robes walking down the street blessing things with a handful of herbs.” I laughed and said “Sounds like my kind of place!” As soon as we arrived in our Airbnb, I wrapped a length of red thread around my left wrist. I was on a pilgrimage to follow the red thread of Mary Magdalene from The Chalice Well in Avalon to the South of France, and I knew I was starting in the right place.

The “lost years,” found

It’s not common knowledge that Mary Magdalene and Jesus as well as many of their closest family members spent time in the land of Avalon in the company of the Druids and Priestesses. What is known as “The Lost Years” of Jesus is only lost because the religious patriarchy did not want people to know about the initiations and training He took in Britain, Egypt, and other Pagan and “heretical” places. I can feel their juicy, living presence in Avalon far more than in Southern France, where it feels reverent, but desiccated and somewhat thin, like ancient lace.

The veil was both thick and thin

The Chalice Well in AvalonThe first time I walked past the Chalice Well Gardens, before I ever entered, I felt a dimensional shift, as if I had walked though a thick, palpable energy field. That was just walking by on the street. Entering the gardens brought instant tears to my eyes and still does just remembering it. I have been here before and before and before. I have prayed here, meditated here, been initiated here, initiated others here. This is my heart’s home.

The way a rose is supposed to smell

The Chalice Well in AvalonOn one of my wanderings through the gardens, I smelled a rose that smelled like roses are supposed to smell. Roses never smell like that in the US. It’s like the scent has been bred out of them. I took one petal and brought it to Em, who was laying on the grass under the Yew trees. One sniff took her on a deep inner journey to the Land of Rose. That one petal held its scent until it was bone dry. This is an image of the actual rose.

The Chalice Well in Avalon

The Chalice Well in AvalonFor the next two days, I explored Avalon and the Chalice Well Gardens. We were there for the Lammas ceremonies on August 1st. I had some precious, sacred moments of alone time with both the wellhead and the Vesica Pisces pool. My time there was very short, but I knew I would be back as soon as I could manage it. Em and I found our venue and began to make plans.

Sexual Healing Priestess

Vesica Pisces Pool Amrita GraceThe truth is, I was an ordained High Priestess before I was trained as a facilitator of sexual healing. On some level, I’ve always felt how compatible these two aspects of myself are, how combining them would be brilliant. I wove that fabric deep inside of me and into my work and how I’ve evolved Sacred Sexual Awakening & Healing® into a presence-based practice… that’s my priestess side all the way. But now, with my priestess sister Em, I bring this potent combination to full fruition, knowing the time is as ripe as a juicy peach…

In deep reverence and delight, I give you

The Sacred Feminine Sexual Mysteries of Avalon

June 15-19, 2020, at the Goddess Hall in Glastonbury with ceremonial initiations at The Chalice Well Gardens and The White Spring. The inner mysteries will take place in The Goddess Hall, Sacred Sexual Awakening and Healing® as a mystical, magical priestess practice. This is the return of the Women’s Sacred Temple in the land of Avalon!

I’ve rarely in my life experienced this kind of deep-level excitement. I feel aligned with the energies that are guiding the evolution of my work, and I know that Mary Magdalene and Mother Mary are part of my team along with Ruby Rose, one of my beloved guides. The trail of red rose petals has no end. The red thread is somehow still on my wrist, 5 weeks later. The door is wide open.

There are more photos on the webpage… be sure to take a look.

I am yours. You are mine. We are One. All is Well.

Blessed be, Amrita Divine Grace

Posted in Avalon | Tagged , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Part 5: The Yoni of the Goddess-The Cave of the Eggs

The Cave of the Eggs… is it a myth or a real place? I don’t actually know, but I’m going to find out.

“I think we’ve lost the trail, Apollo… I haven’t seen any markers in a long time!” I’m starting to feel a tingle of real fear. We have only one protein bar between us and maybe a liter of water at the most and we are in very hot, dry, and steep country filled with underbrush. “We absolutely cannot get off the trail, no matter what!” I add. He has more confidence than I do. I say a little prayer for help. “Stay there and let me look a little farther down,” he says. I stay put. We’ve already climbed 1.5 km up a steep trail to the Grotto, and we’ve got that steep climb back down to do yet. We’re not ready to give up on the special place we’re looking for, but not being lost in the wilderness in France has suddenly become a bigger priority.

48 hours earlier…

Monastery from below | Amrita GraceWe arrived today in Saint-Maximin-la-Sainte-Baume, home of the Basilica of Marie Madeleine (Mary Magdalene). After a week of one- and two-night stands, we get to settle in for 4 whole nights. It feels quite luxurious. We’ll visit the very impressive Basilica which is quite near our AirBnB and drive the next day to the Grotto and Monastery of St. Marie Madeleine, which was miraculously built into a granite rock face and has been lovingly maintained by various orders of monks since the 5th century.

All of these places are known pilgrimage sites, and I’m holding a vision of finding a place that I read about in a recently released book. The place is called Grotte aux Oeufs (The Cave of Eggs). I searched and searched, but I was unable to find any information about this place online. I found only a youtube video that showed the entrance to the cave, and it took my breath away. The book is called Mary Magdalene Revealed: The First Apostle, Her Feminist Gospel & the Christianity We Haven’t Tried Yet by Meggan Watterson (Thank you, mEGGan!)

Trusting Divine Guidance

The Cave of Eggs | Amrita GraceAs we climb the path up the mountain in the steps of pilgrims that have walked this same path for untold millennia to experience the grotto at St. Baume mountain, I silently ask for guidance about finding the cave. I have an idea it’s somewhere in the vicinity of the grotto, along a path on the side of the mountain. We’re deeply moved by Mary Magdalene’s Grotto. As we complete with the Grotto and Apollo looks at google maps on his phone, suddenly Grotte aux Oeufs appears on the map! I am elated, but we still have steep terrain and a network of trails to navigate and many more steps to take.

We take a few wrong turns on the trails and have to backtrack. While we have cell service and google maps, the location service cannot quite place us exactly on the trail. I surrender to Apollo’s navigation and wonder if we’re going to have to give up. We’re getting tired and have not had a proper meal yet today.

French is like cursive… it all runs together

I hear a voice in the distance and we cross paths with a woman who speaks to us in rapid French. Apollo has had some French lessons, but is by no means fluent. We joke that he can say some things in French, but then someone might respond in French and then what would he do? This is one of those situations where she is trying to communicate something and we don’t really understand what. Apollo follows bits of it, says a few words in French, nods his head, and decides it’s about the narrowness of the trail. That was true, but we found out later that’s not what she was trying to tell us. She was trying to tell us we were on the wrong path and that it would narrow to nothing.

Balanced on the ragged edge

The trail is indeed very narrow and rocky, and there are steep drop-offs. Footing is precarious and my mantra becomes, “grounded, present, balanced.” There are a few slips and near misses, but we do just fine. Our knees and ankles are starting to ache. When we finally figure out we are on the wrong trail and just as a surge of panic seeps in around my edges, we find our way back to the trail with no small amount of relief. Again, we backtrack, and find the place where we missed the trail marker on the rock that is an “X”… meaning don’t go this way. We continue on gamely and the terrain starts to look like what I saw in the video. I hear Apollo’s intake of breath and I know that we made it.

Cave of the Eggs Catherdral

Cave of the Eggs | Amrita GraceIt’s a yoni cave, a sacred place of feminine power and presence. I’ve come prepared with a headlamp and it comes in handy. The temperature drops many degrees as I venture into the cave. It’s a very steep downslope and as my tennis shoes find slick, wet rock, I take a tumble. I’m lucky I don’t sprain anything… just a few scrapes and a grubby derriere.

It’s like a cathedral. Offerings have been left and I leave one of my own. I say prayers of gratitude and blessing. We have truly been divinely guided. I’ve learned that divine guidance can come via google when it’s the medium at hand… modern times call for modern measures. I feel fulfilled and gratified.

As we walk back down to the car, Apollo stops and turns around and again my breath is taken away as I look just above the treeline at the perched monastery. I can hardly believe we have hiked that far up and back down. This place is unreal. How on earth was it built? I try to imagine the hundreds upon hundreds of years that it’s been cared for with candles lit in devotion to St. Marie Madeleine. This is not devotion to a “prostitute” or a “penitent sinner.” This is devotion to the closest companion of Jesus… His co-teacher, His beloved first disciple, quite possibly even His wife.

A saline solution

We have a few more days in France before we head home. Our last 3 nights will be on the  Côte d’Azur (Azure Coast) in Villefranche, in a sweet little place right on the water. It will probably be the most vacation-like part of the trip, and I’m ready for some beach and ocean time to help me integrate the incredible experiences I’ve had since we left home on July 29.

I welcome your comments and love hearing from you. The next and last post in this series is about Mary Magdalene and The Chalice Well in Avalon, and it’s the pinnacle of the sacred pilgrimage.

In love and devotion, Amrita

Posted in Mary Magdalene | Tagged , , , , , , | 17 Comments

Part 4: Where the Ley Lines Cross

I don’t know much about ley lines, but they are much more commonly referred to in Europe and the UK. How amazing to learn I was standing right on them!

Ask and Receive

Sometimes information comes in magical and unexpected ways. That’s how I learned about New Eden Retreat Center in The Netherlands. I had a desire to find a new retreat center in which to hold my weeklong retreats for women, but no drive to seek it out. I asked the Universe to reveal the right one to me.

Where the Ley Lines Cross | Amrita GraceA friend and colleague mentioned to me on the phone one day that she’d been doing some research online and stumbled across a retreat center that looked interesting called “New Eden.” My ears perked right up and I told her I would investigate. In less than a week, I was under contract for a weeklong Sacred Sexual Awakening & Healing® Retreat for Women in 2020 in The Netherlands.

From Seed to Flower

A wild idea began to gestate… an impulse to use some accumulated airline miles and visit New Eden ahead of the workshop. It’s always so beneficial for me to see and feel a place in person before I teach there. The trip planning blossomed into a full-on pilgrimage to sacred Goddess sites, with the trip to New Eden sandwiched in between Glastonbury and the South of France.

My original intention was to be at New Eden during an event so that I could experience the place in full form, but it didn’t work out that way. I ended up being there during the height of summer, when most of the staff was on holiday, including the owners. They very graciously offered us a room and use of the commercial kitchen even though the place was nearly empty. We met a couple of really nice folks who live onsite… one who was preparing to give a workshop the following week and another staff member who showed us around the rooms and grounds.

More Than Meets the Eye

New Eden Retreat Center | Amrita GraceAt first glance, the retreat center gives the impression of being rather nondescript and somewhat rustic. It’s a large brick building on 50 acres of meadow and forest 1.5 hours outside of Amsterdam. It boasts a modern commercial kitchen, several well-equipped workshop spaces, and a solar-heated pool. The rooms are simple and clean, all ensuite.

Where the Ley Lines Cross | Amrita Grace On deeper investigation, New Eden is revealed as a highly charged energetic container for inner work. The privacy it affords, even outdoors, lends itself beautifully to the potent Sacred Sexual Awakening & Healing® body of work. Upon speaking with Henk, who lives at New Eden and leads groups of Dutch folks for weeklong cleanses, I learned that there is a ley line that goes right through the building. “In fact,” he said, “there’s a place just outside in a circle of trees where the ley lines cross.” I asked him to take me there.

Where the Ley Lines Cross

Where the Ley Lines Cross | Amrita GraceHenk (a very serious older Dutch man) took off his pink crocheted slipper socks topped with tiny white bunny ears (I didn’t say a word!) and led me barefoot to a circle about 15 feet in diameter anchored by 6 trees. Between them, the land dropped away into bowl about 6 feet deep. He left me there and I spent some time honoring the land and the trees, asking for permission and support for our workshop, and anchoring the energies of our work.

Friesland Flag | Amrita Grace

Flag of Friesland with 6 lily pads

Further research revealed that the Friesland province where New Eden is located is its own special place within Holland. It’s the only one of the twelve provinces of the Netherlands to have its own language, West Frisian, which is the native language of over 50% of the inhabitants of the Friesland province. 

Freaky Friesland to Fascinating France

After leaving The Netherlands for France, I received a text from one of the women who lives at the retreat center that I met while staying there. After meeting me and looking at our website, she wants to attend the retreat. What I’m feeling is that between New Eden Retreat Center and Sacred Sexual Awakening & Healing®, we have a very expansive opportunity for transformation way beyond anything we can imagine right now.

We schedule retreats like this a year or more into the future to give women time to plan for them financially. NOW IS THE TIME to register for this retreat and have the lowest possible tuition and payment plan. There’s a $500 super early-bird discount available… take advantage of this now and we’ll set you up with a monthly zero-interest payment plan that will never be lower than it is at this moment. Remember, once you make the commitment, the support you need will appear in all ways… from finances to child care to time off work.

The Year of World Transformation

2020 is the Year of World Transformation (I hereby declare). The way that works is that you transform YOURSELF, letting go of all that no longer serves you so you can be an overflowing chalice of love, abundance, and inspiration just by being YOU!

Be sure to look over the beautiful web page and reach out to me if you have any questions.

Part 5 is a very exciting and sometimes scary adventure into the wilderness of Provence to find a mythical place called The Yoni of the Goddess – The Cave of Eggs.

With big love and blessings, Amrita

Posted in Sacred Space | Tagged , , , , , | 3 Comments

Part 3: The Long & Winding Road of Being Human

I’m in my final hours before departure now, and so much is already being revealed. I feel like I’m in the middle of a leap to my next level of consciousness. I’ll say more about that soon, but first… a very relevant story.

 Heaven and Hell Down Under

In 2004, I had an incredible opportunity travel in New Zealand for a month in a campervan with my friend Nathan, who was my former boyfriend. I kept a handwritten journal, and one of the reflections from that journal is that traveling takes you out of your comfort zone, your own space, your sanctuary, your privacy. That trip proved to be life-changing for me, but it was a tough, challenging, and very uncomfortable inner journey that had me stewing in my own projections, anger, triggers, and resentment for the entire trip in the midst of such beauty, splendor, magic, and delight. Though I was able to witness myself through it, I was not able to shift the pattern until well after my return home.

Following are some excerpts from my journal (in italics) about the “setup” that I was faced with:

The Man Who Thinks He is God

The infamous Joshua finally showed up. We waited four days for him at Lani & Shiloh’s farm, which was a pleasant wait indeed. Joshua is a cute Venezuelan man Nathan met in his previous travels and whom he greatly admires. I heard many stories about him over the last year, and was not really looking forward to meeting him… especially considering that Nathan agreed to him traveling with us without asking me.

Joshua walks everywhere barefoot, has no job or home, and talks to everyone about his message of peace and God. He considers himself a messiah (deep sigh + eye-roll). He talks non-stop and tells lots of stories about how everything he needs just shows up right when he needs it as if by magic. Nathan hangs on his every word, practically worships him, and pays his way when they are together.

Are You More “God” Than Me? I Think NOT

I have agreed to go on a backpacking trek with Nathan & Joshua for 3-4 days. I am willing to give this man a chance even though I found him vastly irritating before I ever met him. While I do trust Nathan, but I definitely don’t buy into the idea that this man is any closer to God than any of the rest of us.

The past week has been very difficult with my discomfort around traveling with Joshua. We parted ways yesterday and I am relieved and thankful. I am disappointed that I could not fully come to terms with whatever it was I needed to look at that caused the discomfort, but the relief is greater than the disappointment. Nathan has been very supportive to me in my process while at the same time staunchly supporting what his friend is doing in the world. I have had some insights, and I see that what is up for me is very deep core stuff about feeling I am not worthy. For those who have not done much traveling, I can tell you that it is not all relaxation and carefree living.

Everyone here just adores this man Joshua and how he shows up. It’s all around me. It is my intention to dig deeper and make my peace and connection with my spirit and guidance, not to mention my fearful and terrified little girl part, so that I can be fully present for the last few days of this journey, whether Joshua is with us or not.

I do understand more than just intellectually that it is not Joshua that I have a problem with, but something that he mirrors to me that I have trouble looking at. I have known this all along, of course, but when I am right in the thick of it and my frightened inner child is in the driver’s seat, I have to just hang on for the ride.

The Art of Grieving

In the months between ending the romantic relationship with Nathan and leaving for New Zealand, I decided to be fully single for the first time in my adult life. I opened myself to grieving whatever I needed to grieve, especially my past relationships. Going from one relationship straight to the next was my entrenched, lifelong pattern, and the grieving just naturally got stuffed inside as I got caught up in the new relationship energy. I got involved with Nathan just two weeks after leaving my husband of 14 years.

All along I knew that my experience with Joshua was a reflection of my own issues, but could not put my finger on what. As long as I was “in it” and until I was ready to really see what I needed to see and take full responsibility, I could only stay angry with him and utterly baffled at the reason for it. After all, he never did anything to me. I was angry with him before I even met him based on all the stories Nathan had told me about him.

My big breakthrough came two months after returning home from the trip. It took the help of my dear friend Margie (who is Nathan’s partner to this very day, interestingly enough, and I take some credit for the matchmaking). She told me a story that sounded a lot like Joshua’s stories, only she was the one traveling with the shaman across the country, surrendered to his guidance and to whatever showed up. It was the magic and synchronicity that she talked about that reminded me of Joshua’s stories. As I listened to her stories, I finally got it.

Mixed Messages to the Max

 Joshua reminded me somehow of my childhood sexual abuser, yet I found him attractive. Here’s a man walking his spiritual path (barefoot) from a very male-oriented, patriarchal perspective, in direct “opposition” (as I saw it) to my matriarchal, divine feminine path. According to Nathan, Joshua claims that sex is meant only for procreation and should only take place between soul mates, in direct “opposition” to my sexual addiction and recovery path. Talk about feeling judged! I could not relate to him on any familiar level. It also occurs to me that I was in a relationship [with Nathan] that was not aligned with my own soul, and that was being mirrored to me as well.

I felt powerless around Joshua, like a bad, scolded child. Just like when I was a little girl. This was not because of anything he said or did, but how I interpreted what he said and did based on my own inner projections. I drew him to me so that I could grieve my childhood powerlessness and feel my anger around it by standing in it and stewing in it for a month straight with nothing to do about it, nowhere to go with it. I shut down and shut up just like I did as a child. And of course, it was impossible to hide how I was feeling from the others I was traveling with, much to my chagrin.

My current leap in consciousness has to do with becoming like Joshua. Not the barefoot, jobless, homeless part; the part about surrendering and trusting that everything is in Divine Order, Divine Timing, and Divine Grace; that all that is needed will be provided. I’ve had this intellectually for years. My ego had her own version of it. But something Brand New has opened up inside me…

… and I will share more about it in the next installment.

Thank you for taking this journey with me. Part 4 takes place in The Netherlands and it’s called Where the Ley Lines Cross.

Much love and huge blessings, Amrita

 

Posted in New Beginnings | Tagged , , , | 12 Comments

Mary Magdalene the Spiritual Teacher – Part 2: Following a Trail of Red Rose Petals

Mary Magdalene | Spiritual Teacher | Red Rose Petals | Amrita Grace

“Mary Magdalene” by Andrea Solari (1460-1524) Milan, Italy

 


In a bright moment of awakening (accompanied by a sense of being betrayed by the church’s misinformation), I learned that Mary Magdalene was not a prostitute, but a revered disciple, spiritual teacher, and partner to Jesus. It was like an enormous puzzle piece falling into place. Since then, I’ve been following a trail of red rose petals.

Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine Balance

It’s sometime in the mid-2000’s, and like zillions of other people, I’m reading The DaVinci Code. I know the book is fictional, but the story feels infinitely plausible. I realize that the relationship between Mary and Jesus has been misrepresented – grossly misrepresented – by the church. It’s one of the definitive moments of my spiritual life.

The story feels true deep in my bones. It makes perfect sense. Of course the Divine Masculine has a Divine Feminine counterpart! This information once again confirms to me that man’s (and men’s) version of Christianity seeks to control the Divine Feminine and the innate power of women as the givers of life. No wonder I’ve been seeking a path of spirituality that resonates at a much deeper level than the bland, tepid Christianity I grew up with!

Face the Moon, Dear!

During this time, I am studying the path of Priestess in the Dianic Wiccan tradition and the lineage of feminist author, spiritual teacher, activist, playwright, and songwriter Zsuzsanna “Z” Budapest. I meet Z during a full moon ceremony near her home in the Oakland Hills in 1999. I’m a brand new priestess, not even initiated yet, at my first full moon ceremony. Z picks up a candle from the picnic table and asks, “Whose is this?”. I step up to be the first to honor Luna. As I hold my candle to the sky, Z takes my shoulders, turns me to face the moon, and says, “This way… face the moon, Dear.” As embarrassing as it was at the time, I remember it now to acknowledge how far I’ve come in the last 20 years!

Mary Magdalene is a Goddess archetype of the highest order, an ascended master who chose to embody in human form to assist and support the prophesied Messiah. But it would be many years yet before she pierced the veil to work directly with me, to call me home. I needed to attain a certain maturity before I would be ready, both in myself and in my Beloved relationship with my own Divine Masculine.

The Red Rose Through the Ages

There were much earlier appearances that I didn’t understand, going back to my very early 20’s. For example, Mary’s sacred symbol, the red rose, is a very special personal symbol. It’s followed me through the decades and remains very sacred to me to this day. Most notably, I lost a child to an ectopic pregnancy in 1987. Her name was Rose.

It’s 2013, and I’ve been diagnosed with breast cancer. Mary Magdalene reaches out to me through a metaphysical shop owner in Oakland, CA. Also named Mary, she quietly keeps a Magdalene Temple in a nondescript shipping container in the alley behind her business. I’m gifted with two opportunities to visit this precious Magdalene Temple which is filled with orchids and roses.

My breast cancer journey is short and sweet. Leading up to my surgery, I’m reading the incredible book “Anna, Grandmother of Jesus” and learning about Mother Mary’s mother, Anna, a very powerful spiritual teacher. As I go into surgery for my double mastectomy, my first nurse is named Anna, and my nurse coming out is named Mary. It feels like some very special magic to me.

I’ve recently been “assigned” by the Marys to read the book again. I’m absolutely RIVETED by this powerful, first-hand account of the centuries of preparations leading up to the time of Jesus and Mary Magdalene.

Visiting the Temple of my Spiritual Teacher

Mary has made a major reappearance in my life recently. Through a subtle process of listening on my part, She’s invited me to visit Her Basilica in Southern France. Here, in the temples and sacred spaces dedicated to her memory, they venerate Her and have at least as far back as the 5th century. The grotto in the Sainte-Baume mountains where she was said to reside after Jesus’ death is under the care of the Dominican monks (since 1295). The grotto has been tended by three different orders since 415. At the foot of the same mountain lies the town of Saint-Maximin-la-Sainte-Baume, where the town’s basilica is dedicated to Mary Magdalene.

The trip planning begins innocently enough. The original impetus was to visit the retreat center in The Netherlands where I’ll be teaching a women’s retreat at in 2020 with Caroline Muir. My thought is that as long as we’re flying across the pond, let’s stay awhile. Glastonbury and The Chalice Well are already set as the first leg of this pilgrimage. However, the extra week in Europe after visiting the retreat center remains a mystery.

My Very Own Divine Masculine

I invite my Beloved husband, traveling companion, and High Priest counterpart, Apollo, into my office to look at maps and train routes with me. And the trail of red rose petals slowly appears, one by one, as we talk it through. I know almost nothing about Mary’s sacred sites, such as where they are located, what they are called, or what they even are. I just know there are some, somewhere in France. We talk, I search online. Amazingly, my searches take me to all the right bits of information to guide us home to Mary. Even the online searches are part of the trail of red rose petals.

YOU are part of this!

In conclusion, I invite you to take this trip with me. Not literally, of course, but I’ll document and post it every step of the way. I’ll write, I’ll take pictures and video, and I may even make podcasts. Come with me on this journey. Delve into the depths of the mysteries of Mary. Follow the trail of red rose petals with me. Let’s bring Her Sacred Work to the planet, together!

Please leave a comment below and subscribe to the blog to get the next exciting installments of the series!

Part 3 is next, and it’s called The Long and Winding Road of Being Human. It’s about how travel (especially international) can take us way out of our comfort zone…

In love and devotion, Amrita

Posted in Mary Magdalene | Tagged , , , , , | 13 Comments

The Miracle and Magic of Mary Magdalene Emerging in the World – Part 1: Multidimensional Mysticism

Mary Magdalene of the Rose | Amrita GraceDo you know the truth about Mary Magdalene? Slowly, over the years, she’s been teaching and guiding me. And do I have some stories to tell! Here’s the most recent…

Stormy Summer Solstice Shamanism

I walked in late to the Summer Solstice Shamanic Journey circle my friend Lauren was leading, a little agitated. I hate being late. Delayed by my husband’s doctor appointment, I apologized with as much grace as I could muster and settled into my place in the circle. A late afternoon thunderstorm was muttering outside and the power was out at Lauren’s house. Candles were lit and the doors were open to the humid North Carolina summer.

There were several beginners present at this ongoing monthly circle, so Lauren took us back to basics. The first short journey was to explore our inner “garden,” the safe place we go to for healing and interaction with our spirit guides. It was a quick 5-minute journey where I found myself flying above my garden with Tink. (That would be Tinkerbell, who is one of my spirit guides.) She was in pink today, and I really don’t like pink… but not even I can resist Pink Tink!

Not Really my Power Animal

The second journey called for us to go to the “lower world” to meet our power animal. It was a longer journey, 15 minutes. I made myself comfortable in a chair with an ottoman and a pillow to support my neck. The drumming started and I looked for an entry into the lower world. Once there, I found myself in the company of a bunny rabbit that looked very much like the one I’ve been seeing around my yard quite a bit. I wanted nothing more than to pick it up, hold it, pet it, name it Bun-Bun, and love it. It didn’t feel much like a power animal. I let that vision go and surrendered trying to make something happen, which is when the best stuff actually happens.

In the seamless way of a dream, I found myself in the white marble temple that’s adjacent to my garden. There’s a marble tub sunken into the floor that I’ve had magical experiences with before. I melted into the tub. And there before me was Mary Magdalene in red. She didn’t say a word, but I knew she was there to offer me a healing. I was happy to receive it.

Chakra Gifts from Herself

She began by showing me a very large, fully-opened, deep red rose and then placing it in my heart chakra. Not all the way in under my skin, but in such a way that it sticks out of my chest between my breasts. She said (or somehow communicated) “It is from this place that you will connect with me.” I could feel a Piscean activation happening, a Bodhisattva awakening and calling-forth of my known, but not fully embraced, rising sign directive for this life.  

Mary then showed me a long, oval-shaped lapis lazuli cabochon, which she placed into my 3rd eye. A diamond-shaped citrine crystal she placed into the hollow of my throat. A fully open orange chrysanthemum for my solar plexus. She performed surgery to my womb, cutting it open and clearing it before placing a double-terminated white rose inside and closing it up. Then, she attached a spiral of unknown material to my tailbone that went deep into the earth.

Sacred Yoni Healing

Mary Magdalene | Amrita GraceI began to wonder what she would do with my yoni… knowing above all that she would not bypass my second chakra and the seat of my life force energy. (Yoni is the Sanskrit word that means “sacred space.” It’s the prettier, less clinical word for “vagina.”) Much to my surprise, she did healing work inside my yoni similar to what I teach in my more advanced workshops. In the blink of an eye, Mother Mary in blue was supporting me with my head against her breast in the classic position of witness in the triadic Sacred Sexual Awakening & Healing® work I teach women. I’ve known for some time that I was doing the Marys’ work on the planet, and They confirmed it in Their offering to me.

I heard the drumbeat change and knew it was time to come back. In gratitude and wonder I shared my sacred shamanic inner journey with the others in the circle.

I’ve been following a trail of red rose petals that Mary Magdalene has been leaving for me. They are subtle but fully available if I’m willing to slow down, to listen, to be receptive. The magic and mystery of the trail of rose petals is like a treasure hunt. A treasure hunt, for example, that leads me deeper into my destiny. A destiny that includes Her teachings.

A Mystical, Magical Invitation

Mary Magdalene invited me into Her most sacred places, and I heeded the call. I’ll tell you about those sacred places and the pilgrimage I took to visit them in the next installments in the series… be sure to subscribe to my blog (upper right corner of the page) to be notified first when new blogs are published. Ooooh, and please leave a comment below!! I would love to know your thoughts, your visions, and your dreams.

The story continues in Part 2: Following a Trail of Red Rose Petals

Divine blessings of love, healing, and compassion, Amrita

Posted in Mary Magdalene | Tagged , , , , , | 16 Comments

How to Make a Powerful Impact in an Uncertain World

How to make a powerful impact in an uncertain world.

You know you’re here to make a powerful impact, right? Do you find yourself imagining the possibility, dreaming about how it might feel, or pretending like it’s already happening?

I’ve been there. I know that feeling of having a passionate desire to make a real difference on the planet while I’m here. And I know how much effort it can feel like when there’s little reward. It’s time for a new paradigm!

It looks and feels like the world has gone crazy. There’s so much instability in the political climate and the old structures are crumbling. We are truly “between the worlds” right now. What does one do with this uncertain space and time?

This between-the-worlds time is a great time to prepare yourself for what will be needed in the future, and that begins with a vision. What do YOU want for the future? For your future, for the planet’s future? This is not a time to let old belief systems about what can and can’t happen run the show. It’s a time to DREAM BIG and ask, “What else is possible?”.

Once you have clarity about how you want the world (and your world) to look and feel, let that inform what’s next. What steps can you take now to implement this vision, to begin to prepare and act “as if” your vision is really, truly possible? It doesn’t matter how far-fetched it seems to be. What matters is your commitment and devotion to stepping up into that passion to make a difference.

Once you have the commitment, it’s time to assess your inner world. What might hold you back or sabotage your efforts to step into a position of empowered leadership, even on a small scale? Where are your weak spots? What have you not been willing to look at? What inner resources have you cut yourself off from?

There’s one big piece that people often miss in this inventory, and that is life force energy. Do you have full access to your life force? You may not even know the answer. Do you feel vital, fully alive, passionate, energized? If not, there may be something to investigate there.

I want to let you in on a little secret right now. That life force energy I spoke of is really your *sexual* energy. If you have in any way or for any reason cut yourself off from your sexual energy, chances are you don’t have access to this precious, abundant, free resource.

The thing is, nowhere are we taught that our sexual energy is sacred. That our sexual energy is what ignites our passion, our joy, our vitality, and our creativity. Instead, we respond to all the big and little messages and hurts around our sexuality by shutting it down to keep ourselves safe. And these unconscious decisions stay with us until we are ready to shift them consciously.

Unfortunately, those messages and hurts don’t go anywhere. They live on in your body. They impact every aspect of your life. They run your relationships. They keep you playing small. What to do?

As you tune in to that part of you that’s tired of playing small and is ready to step up big and make a powerful impact and a real difference on the planet, let that part lead the way. Let her courage forge the path. Let her sword of truth cut through illusions. Ask her how she needs to be fed in order to flourish. And TRUST the PROCESS!

Training women to become Empowered Feminine Leaders who make a powerful impact is our specialty. We are leading the way in the sexual empowerment re-evolution and we know that impeccable teachers and facilitators are going to be in fierce demand in the coming years. We have a global vision and full access to our life force. Would you like to be part of our team? Check out our brand new website launched on May 1, 2019!

Love & blessings, Amrita

P.S. I had to back-burner blog writing for many months after receiving my global vision… but I’m back, the Teacher Training is implemented, the website completed, and I’m ready to rock the world with my message of how to make a powerful impact as a feminine leader!

Posted in Impact | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Sacred Feminine Mystery School Vision

 

O u r  G l o b a l  V i s i o n

 

 

♥  Imagine a world in which sexual assault, sex trafficking, and childhood sexual abuse no longer exist.

Imagine a world in which parents, schools, and religions teach age-appropriate sexual education that is life-affirming, truthful, shame-free, and respects the sacredness of our bodies.

♥  Imagine a world where balanced masculine and feminine energies are safe to be fully expressed.

♥  Imagine a world where people of all genders and colors accept and acknowledge each other as empowered, sovereign beings.

♥  Imagine a world in which our sexual energy is honored as sacred.

♥  I believe this world is within our reach, in our lifetime. When we heal our own sexuality, we impact every aspect of our lives… our relationships, our families, our work, our passion for life, our health and vitality, and the health and vitality of our planetary society.

♥  Imagine a world in which safe, gentle, effective sexual healing is readily available. It’s here, and it’s called Sacred Sexual Awakening & Healing®.

Learn more about upcoming retreats, weekend workshops, and teacher trainings here.

Posted in Vision | Tagged , , , | 8 Comments

On FIRE and in AWE

[Guest Post by Pat Hastings Burns]

As I sit on the plane waiting for it to take off, my heart is full of gratitude and awe. I am returning to Maui from Oakland, California after assisting Amrita Grace at the Sacred Sexual Awakening and Healing weekend.

The only way I can describe what I am feeling is that I am on FIRE to share this sacred, holy work with all women. This work is powerful and profound as well as gentle and safe. I have EXPANDED and gone deeper than I ever thought possible. I am healing trauma and deep wounding in my body from this lifetime and past generations.

What a great opportunity to assist Amrita and learn how to lead a weekend workshop. Learning to teach this work is one of the best decisions I have made. When I complete my training, I will be able to teach this practice all over the world. How good is that and in divine timing!

Being on the “other side” as an assistant, I watched the women on the weekend transform before my very eyes. The women faced their fears and embraced the Goddess and power within. It was extraordinary and beautiful to be a part of.

As part of my six-month training to become a Certified Spiritual Sexual Educator, I will be leading a weekend workshop along with 2 of my classmates on Maui on January 5-6. The weekend is starting to fill up and we are so excited.

On the plane ride to Oakland for the workshop, I experienced a DIVINE set-up or what I call a GodIncidence. I sat next to a young woman that when we started talking, we didn’t stop for 4 hours.

She is a videographer and just finished shooting a spiritual retreat at Lumeria Retreat Center here on Maui. She lives in Mexico and is a yoga teacher and retreat leader herself. The door opened for me to share about the Sacred Sexual Awakening and Healing weekend when she asked, “What are you going to California for?”

After I shared my journey of healing from sexual abuse, she shared she was drugged and raped by a co-worker recently and hadn’t talked about it or had any therapy for it. I validated her. listened to her story and encouraged her to seek treatment. I invited her to attend the workshop here on Maui in January. She seemed excited about attending it and will let me know if it will work for her. She also said, “Perhaps you can come to Mexico to teach about sacred sexual healing.”

I was led to share with her that I was an Alcohol and Drug therapist for 20 years. That opened another door that was extremely meaningful. She shared her family dynamics as her mother is an active alcoholic. She also shared how she always attracts men who have addiction problems and didn’t understand why.

I shared my story of growing up with an alcoholic mother and what I did to heal. I told her about 12 step programs and how they helped me understand the disease and recover. She was so receptive and said, “I will definitely check out meetings when I return home.”

Holy moly, I could not have chosen a better woman to sit next to so I could share my gifts and wisdom. As the plane was about to land and we exchanged emails and phone numbers, she looked at me and said, “When I was walking up the aisle to find my seat, I prayed and asked God to let me sit next to someone who would have a message for me.”

I know more than ever that I am always guided and provided for when I listen and follow my heart. I “show up” and trust there is a divine plan and God’s timing is always perfect.

From Amrita: Thank you, Pat, for trusting yourself and your guidance and becoming part of the growing community of women who understand the power of Sacred Sexual Awakening & Healing. The Sacred Feminine Mystery School is very lucky to have you as a student learning to teach this work!

Learn more about this work and what you can receive from it in the video below.

 

Posted in Certification | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Why I Didn’t Report My Sexual Abuse

This is a story of sexual abuse. While it’s not graphic in any way, it still may be uncomfortable to read. It does have a very happy ending!

We’ve just come off the week of the Kavanaugh hearings, during which time I was with my stepdad in the hospital. Needless to say, my focus was with my family.

As I headed home from the Mohave Desert where he and my mom live, I began to take in the responses and the backlash from so many people, mostly women, who are now telling their own stories of unreported abuse. I decided to tell my own in solidarity and as an inspiration to others.

Behind Closed Doors

I was around 5 years old when my mom married a violent pedophile who had probably been abused as a child himself (I later determined). Of course, she didn’t know he was violent or that we would suffer sexual abuse… but he looked like Elvis and she was mad for Elvis. She was in her early 20’s with 2 toddlers, recently divorced.

In addition to the sexual abuse, there was physical (extreme punishments for exaggerated misbehavior) and emotional (we were threatened not to tell, ever) abuse. He was in our lives for more than 5 years, and even after he left, my mom would still give him custody of us occasionally. Once it was to learn to shoot a rifle (which I had no desire to do).

Carrying The Secret – Life or Death

I held the secrets in shame and fear until I was 17, and by then I was pretty messed up. My mom was in shock and didn’t know what to do for us. She considered pressing charges but knew that would mean we would have to testify and that would be horrible and traumatic for all of us as well as the words of children against the words of an adult. She never reported the abuse, but she did believe us. This was in the late 70’s, and there was really no clear path to assisting the child victims of abuse. I do not recall being offered counseling or any kind of support to help us work through it.

My abuser died in 2010. As far as I know, he was never prosecuted for his crimes. I suspect there were other victims. 

The Big, Bright Silver Lining

As unfortunate as this sexual abuse story is, it propelled me on a path that eventually led to my sacred work as a teacher of sacred sexual awakening and healing. This came about after 20 years of acting out, destructive behavior, and addiction and co-dependency. I have no regrets and have resolved all of it within myself over the course of my life. I wrote an award-winning, bestselling book about it to support others (and it has helped many) and I offer it as a free PDF on my website as well as print, audio, and Kindle versions on Amazon.

Sacred Sexual Healing Saves Lives

Sacred Sexual Awakening & Healing SAVED MY LIFE. Not so much in a literal sense as my life was never really at risk, but in that it gave me everything I needed to create a life of joy, wholeness, and contentment. It gave me the capacity to attracted a cherished beloved and to navigate my own shadows on an ongoing basis. I believe in this work and am passionate about making it widely available.

I know that high-integrity sexual healing is going to be in huge demand in the coming years because of all that’s emerging now to be healed and integrated. That’s why I created a school and a teacher training for Certified Spiritual Sexual Educators. It’s time for women (and all people) who are ready to heal to have access to TOOLS THAT WORK.

I invite you to share your own story in the comments if you like. Know that you will be heard and believed. It’s time to heal these wounds and be free.

With love and gratitude, Amrita

Posted in Mystery School | Tagged , , , , | 8 Comments

How to Turn a Hurricane Around in 3 Not-So-Easy Steps

Last week I moved across the state of North Carolina right into the furious face of Hurricane Florence. Why did I do this? Read on to find out.

If you’ve ever put a house on the market, you know that you might sit on it for months or it might sell very quickly. Having put our house up for sale in a very slow real estate market two months prior with only 3 or 4 lookers, I was resigned to staying through the winter. Not only resigned but quite content to do so. Resolved, you might say.

Step 1. Sell your house.

Well, sometimes life turns on a dime and suddenly you have a new paradigm! On Tuesday, August 14, the offer came. With a 30-day close. Apollo was scheduled to fly out the next day for a 3-week trip. Holy crap.

I took Apollo to the Asheville airport (an hour east of home) and kept on driving to Raleigh/Durham/Chapel Hill to secure a rental during peak rental season in a 3-college region. Within 24 hours, I was on my way back home with a 6-month lease on a suitable rental and having spent 3 hours with a very generous realtor. It helped that there was really only one rental on the market that was willing to do a 6-month lease. And it was just what we needed! A miracle, for sure.

I packed every day. For days on end. In between bouts of work. And when Apollo got home, we jammed. On Sunday, September 9th, 3-1/2 weeks after the home sale deal was made, Hurricane Florence showed up on our radar. “Shall we delay our move?” asks Apollo. “Absolutely not!” I reply. “Let’s bump it up and hit the road early and see if we can beat the rain.” And beat the rain we did.

Step 2. Cram everything you own into a 26′ Uhaul. 

As we drove East, Hurricane Florence approached the coast with a ferocity that had not been seen for decades. The news media had people whipped into a frenzy and gas stations were running out of gas 150 miles inland days before any weather was due. As we drove the 26′ Uhaul across the state, we witnessed one woman filling soda bottles with gas (and spilling it everywhere) just outside Asheville. We filled the Uhaul with premium gas that day as it was all we could get.

Step 3. Double your drive time to the new location.

The normally 4.5-hour drive took 8+ hours and we arrived in Chapel Hill at 11:00 pm after a day of truck loading and final cleaning that started not all that long after midnight. There was a fender-bender in a parking lot involved… gigantic Uhaul with tired driver vs. parked car. Breathe, ground, rest, and get food while waiting to file the police report. (Insurance covered all damages, thankfully.)

Keeping a close eye on Hurricane Florence, and we began to notice something very interesting happening: the hurricane outlook began to curve around us and was projected to impact the area we left more than the area we were going to!

Hurricane Florence

Projections from early in the week

Hurricane Florence

The blue dot is our new location

We were able to get all our possessions put inside the new house before the rain started. Hurricane Florence eventually brought us several inches of rain, thunderstorms, flash flood warnings, and a tornado watch, but nothing like other parts of North and South Carolina, even 100 miles inland in Lumberton, NC (see photo below). Appalachia was not nearly as impacted as was projected, but still, plenty of rain fell on the Carolinas and surrounding states.

A flooded home due to Hurricane Florence

Image credit: AP Photo/Gerald Herbert

It’s been an utterly grueling month, no question about it. We are perched in a rental for a few months until we find our next home. Escrow closed on the old house right on schedule, on Monday 9/17. We are exhausted, sore, and rest-deprived. And ecstatic. Thrilled.

We have been welcomed into our new community with wide-open arms by people we’ve been cultivating connections with over the past year and a half. People we already love dearly. And all the things we’ve been missing while living in beautiful Appalachia are spread out before us like a fresh, delicious buffet. Restaurants. Ecstatic dance. Community. Health food stores. Shopping options other than Walmart!  Trash and recycling pickup right at our curb! Bike lanes! And the internet speeds… oh Happy Day!

For me, the best thing of all is that the Chapel Hill area has embraced and loved my work like no other place. And while I teach all over the world, it’s nice to have a home base that supports what I do and knows the value Sacred Sexual Awakening & Healing. I already have my next weekend in Durham scheduled for June 1-2, 2019, with a Half-Day Intro on March 16.

There are several other Sacred Feminine Mystery School retreats on the schedule as well.

And finally, the hugely successful and expanding Certified Spiritual Sexual Educator Teacher Training 2019 program begins in May.

Amrita Grace The Sacred Feminine Mystery School

I hope to see you at a retreat or training (or on the dance floor) soon!

Love & blessings, Amrita

 

 

Posted in Elemental Initiations | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

I Have Given Birth to my Sexual Self (Guest Post)

Pat Hastings Burns, AuthorBy Pat Hastings Burns (written after attending the Sacred Feminine Awakening & Healing Maui Retreat).

As I shared in my last blog, I was led to attend the Sacred Feminine Awakening and Healing Retreat on Maui facilitated by Amrita Grace and Caroline Muir. Thank you for your prayers. It was very appreciated.

I have been given the KEYS to unlock the door of my heart to reclaim my life force energy and receive new life, freedom, passion, enlightenment, transformation, and healing. Because of my sexual abuse, I dissociated from my body and didn’t allow myself to receive pleasure. As women, our birthright is pleasure.

I believe the KEYS to my sexual healing are my WILLINGNESS, FAITH, COURAGE and a strong desire to heal deeply. Spirit had prepared me for this retreat that I needed and I was guided each step of the way. I am so grateful for my “YES” and that I didn’t let fear rob me as it had for many years. Instead, with the grace of God, I faced my fear head-on. Alleluia!

It is hard to put into words my experience, but I will try to capture it and share it with you. I have been on the healing/spiritual path for over 40 years and have had lots of therapy, groups, and retreats, but I have never experienced anything like this in all my years. I knew it was time to take my sexual power back as well as clear lifetimes of trauma.

My experience was profound, deep, sacred, holy, and powerful. There were women from the US, as well as from France, Peru, Argentina, Switzerland, Ireland, and Ecuador. The love and sisterhood that was created was extraordinary. We were women sharing and healing one another through our embodiment and through loving one another. Because we are all connected. what each of us does impacts all women.

Our leaders, Amrita Grace and Caroline Muir, created a loving, sacred, and safe container for all of us to open our hearts and heal trauma. We laughed, cried, played, swam, danced, and meditated together. I was surprised that several of the women had not been sexually abused, but were wounded and repressed from childhood and past relationships, both culturally and from their religions.

After attending the retreat and my sexual awakening and healing, something stirred inside of me and it felt like my soul was calling me to work with women and teach them about this sacred experience. I was truly following my heart.

After praying and meditating to discern if it was God’s will and talking to [my husband] Larry about it, I decided to apply for the 6-month teacher training program to become a “Certified Spiritual Sexual Educator.” I had just paid for the retreat and now I was considering putting out a big chunk of money again. GULP. I trusted the money would be provided if this was truly in alignment with God’s will. I know that stepping out in faith and following my heart before the money arrives is essential for my growth.

I felt that this was a call from Spirit, but I didn’t know if I would even be eligible for this training. When I called Amrita to discuss this, she was excited and said, “You are the perfect kind of woman that I want to attract into the program.” We both had chills as the tears were rolling down my cheeks.

I love surprises and synchronicity as well as how Spirit guides and provides for me. The same day I made the decision to move forward and say YES to the certification, I received a call from my son, Brian, telling me he had a buyer for my house in Providence that hadn’t even been put on the market yet. To make it even better, the buyer was going to pay cash. Oh, happy day!

God always provides when I step out in faith, listen to my heart, trust, and act. Receiving the news of an offer on my house on the same day I called Amrita to apply for the certification was a confirmation that I am aligned with God’s will for my life. I am very excited (and scared) about this opportunity to serve and support women, even though I was not looking for another career. I love the saying, “We make plans and God laughs.”

I truly believe that every woman would benefit from this sacred, holy experience. I have been awakened and given birth to my sexual myself.

If this blog has inspired you or helped you in any way, please leave a comment below.

Always with love, Pat Hastings Burns

“There is no greater gift you can give or receive than to honor your calling. It is why you were born. And how you become most truly alive.” Oprah Winfrey

Pat Hastings, MS, LCDP, is the author of the award-winning book Simply a Woman of Faith: How to Transform Your Life & Live in Spiritual Power.  Pat is an internationally-recognized Inspirational Speaker, Workshop Leader, Retreat Leader, and Spiritual Life Coach.

Posted in Sacred Feminine | Tagged , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Tantra, Boundary Violations, Sexual Misconduct, and #METOO

The recent eruption of sexual misconduct and boundary violations has finally reached the world of tantra and spirituality. As a teacher of Sacred Sexual Awakening and Healing®, I’ve long been aware of tantra and “spiritual” sexuality practitioners who bring their own wounding into their work and who do more harm than good. Even those with the best of intentions for healing often have not done enough of their own shadow work, which must be an ongoing process.

Boundary Violations

It can be especially challenging to untangle boundary violations in the western tantra world, where the teachings are often focused on sexual techniques and exchanges. It can be confusing, especially for beginners, to have clarity on their own boundaries when they are learning how to generate and circulate sexual energy. When violations happen, it’s easy to excuse them as part of the practices. It can all seem a little fuzzy. But it does not have to be.

Wounded Healers

Many tantra and spiritual sexuality practitioners (of all genders) come into the work because they want to heal their own sexual wounding. Often, they do not get far enough along in their own healing before they decide they can start helping others. Some come in because they are attracted to the “taboo” aspect of the work or to get in on the “action.” They get cocky and overly confident and consider themselves “experts.”

More Harm Than Good

I think one of the biggest mistakes that these cocky practitioners make is that they underestimate the power of sexual energy to create unseen energetic bonds between people. When sexual energy is exchanged in a session, something much bigger is being created. When the session is over and the exchange is supposedly complete, those energetic bonds don’t just go away. All people, but women especially, can be re-wounded and traumatized by generating and then abruptly cutting off this powerful connection.

Energetically Hooked

I have seen male practitioners using their charm, good looks, and sexiness to attract women as “clients,” making them feel like cherished lovers and then “dumping” them at the end of the session after the money is paid, sometimes very substantial amounts of money. Or perhaps a series of sessions where the client gets totally “hooked” on the practitioner and sometimes even falls in love. It doesn’t matter what kind of agreements were made or intake forms signed, it’s up to the practitioner (whether male or female) to hold CLEAN, CLEAR space for the client to have their own experience. It’s up to the practitioner to hold professional boundaries at all times for the vulnerable client. Period.

It’s not just male practitioners, either, although male clients get “hooked” for different reasons. There female practitioners using their beauty and sexiness to make their living as well. Because tantra and spiritual sexuality is an unregulated field, there are no established requirements or standards for education, practice-hours, or professional conduct. (The exception to this being sexual surrogacy and Sexological Bodyworkers).

Stalking Shadows

I myself came into the sacred sexual awakening and healing because I desperately needed it. I was lucky to find my way to a very high-integrity school and receive my 2-year certification and 4-year apprenticeship with a teacher who had clear boundaries and held her students to very high standards and ethics. I also encountered teachers along the path who did not hold clear boundaries and saw the impact of that on others and felt it in my own being. It took me years of practice and study to fully manage my own boundaries and to be able to hold safe, clear space for others. To this day, I am vigilant about stalking my own shadows and maintaining the highest integrity and ethics in my teachings.

Crystal Clear Boundaries

My own philosophy in my work is that there are clear, distinct roles in sexual healing. There’s a facilitator and a receiver, and sometimes, a witness. There is clear intention that there will be no “exchange” of sexual energy. The facilitator holds a safe, sacred container for the receiver to have her own experience, whatever that might be. The receiver may be processing anger or rage, or she may be experiencing the awakening of her sexual energy, and it all belongs to her.

Presence – The Feminine Way

The way I teach this work, the facilitator comes into pure, empty presence and holds clean, clear space with intention for the greatest good of the receiver. The facilitator’s only engagement is with herself, keeping herself grounded and fully present. It’s a deeply magical space that allows the receiver to have a pure, unadulterated experience of HER OWN ENERGY. Whether she is laughing, crying, screaming, sounding, or silent, it’s all about her. The presence, clarity, and emptiness of the facilitator allow the receiver to be guided by her own soul to her perfect healing, expansion, and integration.

The Feminine Sexual Empowerment Revolution

The Sacred Feminine Mystery School is on the leading edge of this Re-Evolution. High-quality Sacred Sexual Awakening and Healing® teachings are needed by people of all ages and genders. The Feminine is leading the way, and that’s why Caroline Muir and I are training WOMEN to be Certified Spiritual Sexual Educators® with very high standards and ethics. We are paving the way for a world where the cultural sexual shadow is safely HEALING and TRANSFORMING into something new. We are forging new pathways of connection and relationship between the masculine and the feminine. As we all heal from the abuses of the past, we are visioning and creating a New Reality. Are you with me?

How do you see yourself as part of the Feminine Re-Evolution?

(For a deeper dive into the subject of this blog, see the Facebook Live video.)

 

Posted in Mystery School | Tagged , , , | 22 Comments

The Sacred Dance of Masculine and Feminine

The Masculine and Feminine Dance

Yule, or Winter Solstice, is a high holy day that predates Christmas by thousands of years. It’s one I’ve recognized and celebrated in addition to (and more often instead of) Christmas since 2000. As I revisit the lore and mythology of Yule this year, I see a bigger picture that is very relevant for our times: an elegant dance of balance between the masculine and feminine principles.

The Wheel of the Year

My own priestess lineage outlines the God and Goddess story, which illustrates the circle of death and rebirth intertwined with the wheel of the year. It also illustrates the ongoing dance between the sacred feminine and the divine masculine. Here’s the story as I learned it as a young priestess initiate:

At the Winter Solstice, the Sun God (the light returning) is born of the Goddess. It’s likely this helped fuel the Christian mythos of the son of God being born at this time. The Sun God grows and is a small boy at the time of Imbolc (February 2nd). He continues to mature through the Spring Equinox, and by Beltane (May 1), he is in his prime. He mates with the Goddess at this time of the rising sap and riotous blossoming in nature, and then reaches his peak of power at the Summer Solstice (strongest light). From there, he begins his decline through the harvest festivals of Lammas (Aug 1, Autumnal Equinox, and Samhain (Halloween) as the Goddess gestates her pregnancy. During the harvest time, symbolic sacrifices might be made to return his energy to fertilize the earth (ie, burning a straw man, or effigy). During his decline, the Goddess rises in her power as ruler of the dark time of the year, the feminine, the womb, and the time of hibernation. And that takes us back to Winter Solstice when the Sun God is born of the Goddess once again.

The Balance of Masculine and Feminine Power

There is such a beautiful balance of power and support in this exchange. The Goddess as Mother nurtures the God into maturity and watches him shine as he grows and gains power. At his prime, they bring their energies together as Lovers and create new life. As he makes his natural decline, she shines in her power through the harvest season. He gives himself in death to the health and fertility of the land and the fields. And once again at Yule, she gives him birth and nurtures him through the winter.

Bringing it Home

How can we bring this example of the dance of the masculine and feminine into our lives and relationships? That is a pretty complex question. There is such an imbalance of power in the world right now, and there has been for a good long time. However, something is shifting as women come forward to claim their sexual sovereignty, as they have been doing for the past several decades. It’s filtered up from the counterculture of the 1960’s all the way into the mainstream as women step forward and courageously name their aggressors.

Owning it for Ourselves

Ultimately, we must find this dance of masculine and feminine balance within ourselves. We each have all of these energies within us, no matter what our gender – masculine, feminine, perpetrator, victim, and enabler – along with all the other aspects of ourselves that are both conscious and unconscious. Yule is a wonderful time to reflect on the more hidden aspects as we enter the darkest time of the year and emerge into the newborn light.

With bright blessings for your holy day season, Amrita

What would you like to “bring to light” this Yule? Please share in the comments below.

Check out The Sacred Feminine Mystery School’s events, including Sacred Feminine Conversations, a Free Global Sisterhood Gathering on January 18, 2020.

 

 

Posted in Mystery School | Tagged , , , , | 12 Comments

6 Simple, Powerful Ways to Engage your Inner Sacred Feminine

Our planet needs us to rise to our full divinity, and most of all, and the Sacred Feminine is delivering. The need for balance in all things is being revealed as our global community experiences turbulent weather pattern shifts, increasing political unrest, and an epidemic of emerging sexual shadow. How can we take full responsibility for our own lives and creations?

Begin within

The Sacred Feminine calls for balance right at the root of things – in our own bodies, relationships, and homes. Deeply loving, conscious, compassionate connection to ourselves and to those we love is the first step toward creating balance in the collective consciousness. We become examples for others when we practice elevating our own lives and relationships to the highest level of integrity and communication.

What is the Sacred Feminine?

The new Sacred Feminine is not the matriarchy of the past, nor does it seek to override the current patriarchal rule. It is a new paradigm of honoring the Feminine within everything: ourselves, whether we are male or female; the earth and all her elements and inhabitants; and each other, regardless of race, gender, economic status, or lifestyle. The Feminine brings us the yin qualities of receiving, openness, restfulness, repose, and reflection. Combined with the yang qualities of giving, action, and accomplishment, a balance of give-and-take emerges creates harmony within and without.

Calling Her forth in yourself

As we embody our Sacred Feminine selves, there are some specific ways that we can enhance the rising energies. Here are some ways to get started:

1. Connect with the Earth, outside in nature. Acknowledge her as a living being. Talk with her and listen to her answers. Everything contains consciousness: the sky, the stars, the moon, the plants, the creatures, the rocks, and even the dirt. Walk barefoot whenever possible to allow the wisdom and healing frequencies of the Earth to enter your body.

2. Open your energy channels to the earth and the sky. Your spinal column is a channel for energy that can be invited up from the Earth through your feet and the base of your spine and be sent up into the realms of spirit through the crown chakra and drawn back down into the Earth. You can run this energy through all your energy centers, increasing your vitality and connection with life.

3. Embody your Shakti. Shakti is your creative life-force energy, so much more than sexual energy. Whether you have an intimate partner or not, you can use this abundant resource to revitalize and heal your body and fuel your passion and creativity.

4. Heal yourself first. Because we are all connected, what each of us does individually impacts all others. Paying attention to your own healing first and foremost prepares you to give more fully of yourself from a place of inner balance and overflow.

5. Connect with others of like-heart. Come together in sacred space and share your truest self. See and acknowledge the essential divinity in yourself, in others, and in all of life.

6. Address your sexual healing. We all need it. Because of the impact of religion, advertising, and porn culture, sexual wounding is deeply embedded in the collective. Women are leading the way in this work! If you want to be one of them, check out the Teacher Certification Trainings and Retreats we offer through The Sacred Feminine Mystery School.

The time for the new Sacred Feminine infusion is upon us, and now is the time to assist and support each other through the accelerating changes of our era. These are the times we chose to be born into.

Please share your personal practices for connecting with your inner feminine in the comments.

Posted in Mystery School | Tagged , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

The Integration of the Solar Feminine

Creative. Passionate. Receptive. Focused. Pulsating with power.
Glowing with good health. Radiant with self-confidence. The Solar Feminine.

Venus transited the Sun early in June 2012, signifying the rise of a new feminine archetype: the Solar Feminine.

The Lunar Feminine

In recent history, the feminine has been associated with the moon, that heavenly body which does not shine its own light. Rather, it reflects the light of the sun (associated with the masculine). This is an interesting analogy of the role that women have played for the past few thousand years… that of being the reflectors of the shining solar masculine. Consequently, it’s time for the masculine and feminine to come into harmony and balance. It seems like equality isn’t even really the right concept because there are different but complementary gifts that each bring to the mix.

The Power of Yin

The Solar FeminineThe lovely paradox here (and I love paradoxes), is that as women step into empowerment, we must learn to embody the power of our YIN. Yin is the ability to receive; to ask for what we want; to understand our innate power to magnetize all that we desire without needing to chase, quest, and conquer. We get to learn how to recline on the velvet chaise to balance out the busy times. Power meetings with our teams and hours of intense output require downtime. It doesn’t matter if it’s taking care of the house and kids, hours on the phone with clients, planted at the computer desk, or bending over a massage table. Whatever form the giving of our gifts to the world takes must be offset with rest, recreation, fun, and play.

Amrita Grace The Solar FeminineShadow Hunting

I’ve been on a parallel path with the emergence of the Solar Feminine. Her life story and mine are intertwined. What it has taken for me to learn how to recline on the velvet chaise has been no small feat… and I’m still learning. For me, and in the feminine collective, it’s been a journey of intense internal shadow excavation. Most of all, that means leaving behind the old programs of care-taking, control-freaking, shutting up, and all manner of unhealed, compounded wounding we’ve carried through untold generations. I often feel my ancestresses cheering from beyond the veil as I do this work. I ride the leading edge on the back of a tiger, slashing with my sword through old paradigms of feminine victim-hood, martyrdom, and sexual abuse and repression.

The Crucible

Amrita & Apollo Grace The Solar FeminineSeems like I GET to be a change agent, a catalyst, a cauldron stirrer, a crucible. In addition, I get to be all of that from a soft, feminine place, living in harmony with the masculine. I also get to embody wholeness and be a living example of what’s possible when a woman is willing to face her demons and then hug them and welcome them home. I’ve learned to weave my life and work and play and marriage together into a rich, gorgeous, colorful, beautiful tapestry that depicts harmonious scenes of a well-lived life. And, as a beautiful bonus, I have the incredible privilege of being able to share this path to wholeness with those who are seeing me and saying, “I’ll have what she’s having!”

In conclusion, I celebrate that The Solar Feminine has risen in the East, the direction of new beginnings, of sunrise, of Spring, of youth, of playfulness, and the color of orange. She has met the shining masculine in all his powerful glory, bringing a spirit of collaboration, compassion, and creativity. Can I hear a hallelujah?

Blessed be, Amrita  

Posted in Mystery School | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Breathe Yourself to Wholeness

If you’ve never experienced breathwork, you are in for a real treat! Breathwork is a powerful healing process that brings forth your own inner healer and has the capacity to release dysfunctional patterns and addictions as well as take you into states of pleasure, delight, and bliss. It’s a highly individual process and every journey is different. It’s a natural way to experience altered states of consciousness assisted by music, your breath, and your intention.

I had my first experience with breathwork in the early 2000’s. It was called Maitri Breathwork and was led by a woman named Anahata in the small mountain community of Murphys, CA. It was an 8-hour experience. I always did like to dive in deep! I found it very healing and loved the natural altered states I could get to. Getting up to go to the bathroom was like being on another planet!

I was exposed to Holotropic Breathwork a few times after that initial experience and found it to be a mixed bag. I loved the loud, evocative music and again, the realms of consciousness not normally available to me. But there was something not quite “complete” about it. I often did not feel grounded afterward.

Then, in 2008, I had the opportunity to experience Shamanic Breathwork®. It was in this magical space that I met my Beloved, Apollo. I asked him to be my co-journeyer – my breathwork partner. In Shamanic Breathwork, I found a freedom of expression, a permission to explore that had not been available to me in previous breathwork sessions. Afterward, we were given art supplies to create a mandala of our inner experience, something that was new to me and that I found to be the missing piece.

Two years later, I was back in that same room, once again in a Shamanic Breathwork holding co-journeyer space for my Beloved. As he came out of his breathwork, in complete silence, he proposed to me. I responded with an enthusiastic but equally silent YES!

My most powerful Shamanic Breathwork experience took place on the Isle of Lewis in Scotland, which contains the Callanish Standing Stones (a complex of many stone circles). When I was first introduced to the stones, they felt like old friends. Curious about that, I took the question into my Shamanic Breathwork session. What was revealed was amazing!

As a breathed my way into an alternate reality, I was shown the standing stones with very light, almost transparent beings weaving through the tops of the stones. They seemed to live above ground, and I was one of them. They showed me that I was a queen in this realm and that some of them had chosen to embody themselves AS the stones. So yes, they were indeed old friends! Tears poured down my face as I recounted the experience to my Beloved (now my husband).

As of June 2017, Apollo and I are both now certified as Shamanic Breathwork Facilitators and we’ll be bringing this powerful work into the world! The next retreat that includes Shamanic Breathwork takes place in Colorado on July 16-19, 2020. Learn more here.

Love & blessings, Amrita

Posted in BREATHE | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

Sexual Healing – The Leading Edge of Personal Growth

Have you done a ton of healing and personal growth work and yet still feel disconnected from your sexuality? I had this exact experience after going through several years of therapy and a variety of personal growth workshops in the late 1990’s. I had to face the fact that none of the work I had done so far addressed my sexual wounding. It was back to the drawing board.

The Miracle of Sexual Healing

Then, by some miracle, I found my way to a school that taught high-integrity sexual healing. I took a weekend for women, signed on for the 2-year certification program, and never left. I moved quickly through the ranks from student to assistant to teacher to administrator to director of the school until it closed in 2012. A few months later, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. The tools I had gained from my sexual healing and awakening work helped me clear cancer quickly, joyously, and with tremendous ease.

Making it Accessible

In 2017, I received a powerful and compelling global vision and it was abundantly clear that I was charged with making Sacred Sexual Awakening and Healing® much more widespread and accessible. I knew it was time to train facilitators and The Sacred Feminine Mystery School® was born.

Clearing Lifetimes of Trauma

Because we bring a ceremonial element to the work, it is quite multi-dimensional. What that means is that natural altered states of consciousness become accessible. Subtle altered states often lead to visions of past lives being healed and assistance from higher guidance. Ancestral trauma can be cleared in a very short space of time. These are just a few examples of what’s possible even in a very short, fully clothed sexual healing session.

Powerful, Safe, Feminine

The fully clothed Sacred Sexual Awakening and Healing® (also known as The AH Practice®) was developed by Caroline Muir. It’s the most powerful, safe, feminine, and accessible sexual healing modality available today, and it continues to evolve and spiral deeper into the feminine. I love teaching this work and witnessing the miracles that people experience as a result of loving, healing energy work with permission, presence, and no agenda is brought to their bodies, including their lower chakras. Leaving out the lower chakras is the missing piece in all the other healing modalities. The lower chakras are strictly off limits, and that’s totally appropriate.

Bring on the Blessings

It’s time for something new and I’m here to bring it to the world… this is what I was born to do! I love teaching The AH Practice, which I have been immersed in since 2005. This practice helped me fully heal my sexuality and attract an amazing and beautiful beloved relationship into my life. It’s time for this potent work to be available to everyone who wants to live a fully integrated life.

You Can Have it, Too!

If you feel called to learn more, please visit our events page. Applications are being accepted for our teacher and practitioner training Certification Program for 2020. I am beyond thrilled and very honored to be fulfilling my sacred purpose on this planet in this way.

With immense gratitude and love, Amrita

 

 

Posted in Mystery School | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

When Kali Comes Out to Play

Kali unfurls her tongue in her role as the ultimate deliverer called upon to salvage a situation that seems hopelessly out of control.

A little bit of backstory…

In August of 2014, on the heels of my dance with breast cancer, I made a solo sojourn to my home and roots, Northern California, to visit my nearest and dearest friends and family. I made a 1000-mile figure 8 loop that took me from the Bay Area to Calaveras County (where I lived for 13 years) to the Sierra Foothills and Tahoe, visiting every dear friend and family member I could find. It took me a month. That was my last trip to CA. I was long overdue for a visit. I had not seen my three sisters or two best women friends in two and a half years.

California dreamin’

It was a short trip, and Apollo joined me for this one. I made plans to briefly visit my two besties and my mom and sisters. It was hectic and the visits were short but sweet. When someone asked me why I was making this trip, I thought for a moment and said, “I’m here to love the people I love!” I didn’t really grasp that wouldn’t be all sunshine and roses. Just a few days in, the dramas began to unfold.

Elephant in the room

I’m going to change the names to protect the innocent. I’m not looking to embarrass anyone or elevate myself in any way. Mostly, this story is about the power of love in all its forms and what I’m willing to do for those I care about. Hold space for intense meltdowns. Shift from mild-mannered visiting sister/friend into a wicked “tough love” paradigm-shifter. Call out the elephant in the room that’s left piles of poo everywhere. The elephant no one else is willing to see or talk about. I love elephants, don’t get me wrong… but those invisible, metaphoric space-holders call out my Kali, especially when they involve someone I love.

Not quite what we had in mind…

The first drama involved a couple, dear friends both of them, who were experiencing intense, painful challenges in their relationship. I started getting angry texts before we even arrived, and once we did arrive, both Apollo and I held a powerful space for this beautiful couple to dive deep and navigate the underworld. Things felt stable when we left, and we felt we had been a true contribution to them. But it definitely wasn’t what we had envisioned for a visit. Apollo and I left ever so grateful for the loving, solid, easeful relationship we have.

Collateral damage

The next stop left me shocked and appalled. To see someone so dear to me several years into heavy drug and alcohol addiction and all of that showing on her face and in her nearly-wrecked life. Having not seen “Jennifer” in more than 2 years, I could see the heavy damage to her body and especially her face. It reminded me of some “before and after” pics I had seen once online of meth addicts whose faces had deteriorated beyond recognition. I was seeing a skull instead of a face. It scared me badly and my inner Kali began to rise.

Gathering the forces of good

I was reunited with Jennifer’s daughter “Angela,” who was not speaking to her mom because of the addictions and felt the loss deeply. She’s in her early 20’s. Since we were all going to be in the same room together, I invited Angela to write out her thoughts and feelings. Then I decided that some kind of intervention was in order. My time was short. I would be on a plane early the next morning. I invited all the others that we would be gathering with to write something to Jennifer as well. No one responded to my email. The elephant grew bigger. It was up to me and Angela. After avoiding Jennifer during the gathering and seeing how that impacted her, Angela finally decided to give her the 8-page handwritten letter. I had read it already. It was heart-wrenching. She wanted her mama back. They had grown up together and were best friends.

Kali roars to life

I decided this was my time to move. Jennifer’s façade was cracked. The hardened addict that refused to feel anything and masked all her pain with drugs and alcohol was feeling something. And Kali came roaring to the surface. I had been so supportive and loving in the past, not judging Jennifer for her drug use, just loving her. That wasn’t working. At all. I asked hard questions and made harsh observations. Just me and Jennifer, one on one. She wouldn’t look me in the eye until I demanded it. I pointed out the car “accident” she had recently had, totaling her truck (which wasn’t her fault, nothing was ever her fault). No such thing as accidents, Kali told her. Wake up call. WAKE UP before you lose EVERYTHING! Including your 15-year old daughter, who is cutting herself in her room. “Why do you suppose she is doing that?” asked Kali… “Perhaps because she has no mom and her home life is trashed?”

Good cop, bad cop

Angela and I naturally fell into roles of good cop and bad cop. Angela, crying for her mama back from her broken-heart space somehow reached through the hard shell of addiction, and Kali waltzed in for the kill. That necklace of skulls is not made of plastic, you know. Kali slashed the air with her knife and cut through the bullshit and excuses.

Tough love

In the end, Jennifer told the gathered group that she would go into rehab. She nearly chickened out of that, but between Angela’s powerful request that she do so and Kali’s enforcement, it happened just before we all left the gathering. Now, we must all hope and pray for redemption for the one we love and almost lost.

Compassionate Kali

Kali is considered one of the most compassionate of the Hindu deities because she provides liberation to her children. She and Shiva are the destroyers of unreality. The ego trembles in the presence of Kali, knowing that its demise is imminent. A person who is attached to their ego will not be receptive to Kali and she will appear in a fearsome form. A mature soul who engages in spiritual practice to remove the illusion of the ego sees Kali Ma as very sweet, affectionate, and overflowing with incomprehensible love for her children. [Adapted from http://www.goddess.ws/kali.html]

Hope and prayers

I love you, Jennifer. I pray for you every day. May the universe conspire to bring you everything you need to transform into the woman you were born to be. Mother, Wife, Sister, Daughter, Auntie, and perhaps eventually, Grandmother.

Blessed be, Amrita

Posted in Shadow | Tagged , , , | 10 Comments